Breaking and Entering…

It was NOT the day to dress in all black, let me just start off with that…

Secondly, for the record, this all happened because I was trying to be a law abiding citizen. It just shows that sometimes it’s just better not to try so hard…

You see it all started last week I shot a small commercial job in front of an old building on the outskirts of downtown.

When the client saw the images, they absolutely LOVED the location but need some additional shots. It’s always one thing to use a location once, but getting permission to use it again is not always easy. Especially when it inconveniences the owner and…

So with some deliberation and with the fear of rejection hanging in the air, I headed back over to the building today, just thirty minutes before our shoot, crossing my fingers that they’d agree to let us shoot there (again).

But when I walked up to the building I saw only two doors, but neither of them looked quite right. The first was a small side door – obviously some kind of service entrance… And obviously NOT meant for visitors.

When I tried to open the second door, what appeared to be the main door, it opened easily but right behind the door there was a large black wooden object, blocking me from entering. It almost looked like a huge dresser or something pushed up against the door. But as I stared at it in confusion I realized that there was about a four inch gap between it and the doorframe, enough space so that I could see the store lights.

It was confirmation. I wasn’t crazy. THIS WAS A STORE. I just couldn’t get in…

So I figured that whatever this doorway was, it had to be a side entrance, or an old entrance that was now blocked off. Now I just needed to find the main one. So I “canvassed” the property again (like my lingo?) but still couldn’t find another door.

Now, yes I do live in a state of confusion most of the time, but at this point I was really really confused. There were cars out front, and I could see that the lights were on inside, but there was NO door. WHAT???

Soo, after a few moments of deliberation, I decided instead of continuing (in vain) to find the “real” door, I’d try the door that was blocked again. So I ventured back over the front of the building and opened the unlocked door one more time, skeptically eying the opening between the object pushed up against it and the door frame.

I nudged the black object and lo-and-behold it moved, just a hair. I pushed harder and it moved almost an inch. At this point I realized that if I pushed against the black object hard enough I could probably squeeze through.

For a moment I considered trying to find the “real” entrance again, but I could see lights and a blur of “merchandise” (the criminal lingo is coming easier now) through the crack…

So I pushed against the mystery black object as hard as I could, closed my eyes, held my breath, and wedged myself through the narrow slit of an opening. Seconds later I was successfully standing inside the store feeling very proud of myself for the small feat. Victorious!

Then I saw THEM…

Their were two women standing about twenty feet off to my right in the middle of the store with slightly fearful and definitely shocked looks on their faces. In fact, I’m pretty sure they started backing away from me…

At this point I realized that whatever this place was-it was definitely NOT open…

And I realized that whatever I just squeezed through was definitely NOT an old door they’d just forgotten about…

I opened my mouth to protest my innocence (or in this case “ignorance”) as I turned to look what I had just broken in through. It was one of those old doors that are mounted on a rail system and slide over entryways and you actually padlock them shut. So basically there was a door behind a door. I just happened to be able to fit through the second one that was “locked”.

My mouth opened in an “OOOOOOOhhhhh” at the same time the ladies started walking towards me (evidently having decided that I was harmless). They began to usher me out the same way I came, telling me that they were closed, as I backed up towards the doors, apologizing profusely.

But there was one small problem here…

I still needed permission to shoot on the property I had just broken into.

So I stopped the shorter of the two and was like “Ummm….Well…Can I ask you a question?”

At this point I really did realize that I should probably just apologize again and leave, so I apologized again…

Then I started laughing (the doubled over kind)…

Still doubled over laughing at this point…

The shorter of the two ladies finally cracked a smile and said “Since we’re closed (pointing to the door I had just managed to break through) you are totally welcome to shoot anywhere outside you’d like.”

So with another round of apologies and laughter, I walked out through the now OPEN doors. It was only then that I saw their “Open” sign that very clearly stated the days they were open. I’d read it before but evidently….

P.S. For those of you who have asked me if they have wireless in jail, I’ll have to get back to you on that…